Sunday, April 4th 2021

3:05 P.M.

I had never been a caffeine taker in my life. Every Saturday we would have a coffee time at my grandparents’. They’d drink black coffee with a moderate amount of sugar (my family didn’t fancy sweet stuffs). I’d look at them as if they had the best time of their life.

I didn’t get it. What was so great about coffee? Black coffee, milk coffee, even I had tried most of the local brands of coffee packets—the ones which contain lots of sugar. I took a sip of others’ coffee. Bleh. They all tasted like shit. It was even worse than soda which burnt your throat like hell. Not to mention the headache coffee gave.

I was just trying to get how it felt to enjoy the drink. I kept trying lol

And I thought to myself, “Maybe because I’m a kid. Maybe I will get it once I get older.”

It was the same energy as myself when my cousins exposed me to pornography at the age of 10.

“Why the fuck would they do that?”

That thought never changed until now lol

But okay, give it the benefit of doubt, let’s see how it goes when I get into 30s.

Also, that time when I watched a movie, it quoted

“Love is like a coffee. Good when it’s hot, but you’ll run out of it. Otherwise, by enjoying it slowly, you’ll risk it becoming cold.”

My pre-teen self didn’t get it but like, that was deep yo, whoever decided to make that quote.

Flashback to 2018, I still had my curiosity for coffee. I used to wake up 5 A.M. to go to work and I wanted to have the energy boost. Only The Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf was opened that early—near the train station in front of my apartment.

I simply asked the barista for a coffee which a non-coffee lover would love. He suggested Iced Mocha because it was blended with chocolate flavor.

Okay, I love chocolate, let’s try it out.

Yo for the first time in my life, I thought to myself, this is it. This is it, chief, a coffee for me. I couldn’t taste the coffee at all!!!

It became one of my regular beverages. I felt cool, hey I drank coffee, I was a grown up.

And I said, you know what, let’s level it up. I was going to try from the sweetest/mildest coffee to the strongest coffee which was espresso. I was going to increase my caffeine tolerance. My sister said I was out of my mind because even caffeine addicted people tried to quit coffee (because too much caffeine could kill you). I had to admit, that was a stupid idea, I just realized it now.

Then, fast forward to that time when my friends and I went out at 9 P.M. until morning. We went bowling, 24 hour shops, rode bus to karaoke bar, etc. I bought iced mocha to keep me awake, but this time we only found Starbucks (because it was v v v late).

After I took a sip of it, what the hell? It tasted like coffee. IT TASTED LIKE COFFEE. IT WASN’T THE SAME SWEET ICED MOCHA FROM THE COFFEE BEAN & TEA LEAF. It. Was. Bitter. And it gave me headache.

At the end, I couldn’t even drink a quarter of it, so I gave it to my friend and her boyfriend. I think I only took like 5 short sips?

At that moment, I assumed I would probably die before I get to drink espresso.

Starbucks and famous overly priced coffee shops were overrated anyways. I didn’t have to spend money to force myself into something I didn’t even like. It was like $8 a cup?

By the way, I’m drinking caramel macchiato now. I had leftover caramel sauce, so I poured vanilla syrup + instant coffee + milk + ice cubes. Tasted super sweet, but tolerable kind of coffee.

Mineral water stays superior.

Oh yes, and one other reason I shouldn’t drink caffeine because I couldn’t even sleep at night if I drank iced matcha latte or this caramel macchiato in the morning/afternoon.

Recently I just found out that matcha had almost the same amount of caffeine as coffee. All these times I thought the milk in matcha latte could neutralize the caffeine in matcha because you know, milk & sweet stuffs make you sleepy. Caffeine makes you awake. Apparently, it doesn’t.

If I drink espresso or americano, I’ll probably be awake for half a week.

So, yeah, I gave up on coffee.

Kind Regards,

C